Being an emotional eater?

Exploring the dark side again. Somewhere in the dark world of abuse and abandonment I developed crazy eating patterns. As an adult I understand both my mother's behavior and somewhat my father's. I have successfully overcome depression and anxiety attacks, but now I want to explore the emotional world of my eating patterns and come up with effective strategies for my weight loss. There is an irrational part of my upbringing that I think affects how I eat.

I am one of the fastest eaters I know. I am also subject to binges. There are times when I'm not even thinking about it. 

It is time that I understand the irrational part my motivations. It is time that I bring it to awareness explore the feelings the negative and irrational ideas behind it. Like the lies of depression there are distortions in irrational eating. Bringing them to awareness and understanding them will also give me basic understanding into what strategies I use to put the anxiety of it to bed. To live life in my 60s free from the crazy world of emotional eating is a good goal. 

I am reading for first time Cognitive Behavior Workbook for Weight Management and Love Hunger an older work. I will also be looking into other works that I have read.

I'm going to keep a notebook jotting feelings, what I'm thinking, times when I binge eat or say no and how do I feel about that. Are there feelings of anxiety. Can I bring into awareness feelings and thoughts that I'm not sure. What are the lies that I'm dealing with? And what is the truth then I need to replace it with. 

When I was dealing with lies of depression, each one had a truth to counter it. I developed an anxiety about lying down my bed was like laying down in a coffin. The anxiety was intense and could not be ignored. The truth was lying down did not mean death. I had to both distract and replace the intense negative feelings with positive activities like listening to music, praying for my friends and family, reading, I chose detective novels. The anxiety loss its energy and soon I found the bed a friendly confine again. There were other strategies to make the bedroom more friendly. The results were wonderful.

I am just beginning to look at my emotional eating. The crazy thing is it is irrational. I am convinced that comes from the twisted world of abuse and betrayal. It is not about blaming my parents. It is about choosing not living emotionally from the past and taking ownership of today and the future. Will it unlock a better weight loss, will see.

It is not easy to tell you the weak links in my mental health. I think it's okay if you think it's crazy. I actually think it is to. 

I am 63 and I am free from depression. The anxiety attacks around my sleep disorder have put the rest. It was absolutely worth the effort to do so. Today I know 25% of people who are 63 are clinically depressed. I share my own mental battles to encourage others to get the help they need so that their senior years can't be free the "black dog". Now I'm looking at my eating, keep walking.